Servitude

I am teaching at a conference where I have had the privilege of listening to a excellent speaker the last couple of days.  She brought up a great quote from Harriet Tubman, “I have freed thousands of slaves.  I would have freed thousands more…had they known they were slaves.”  What a simple and convicting thing to say.  What makes this such a great quote is how true this is of so many things.  We are mastered either by the world or by Christ; we are slaves.  We might like to think that we are the masters of our own destiny, the captain of our own ship.  The truth is we are not in control.  We will either be ruled by the culture around us or by the book that guides us.  I hope that book is the Bible. 

Don’t you know that when you offer yourselves to someone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one you obey—whether you are slaves to sin, which leads to death, or to obedience, which leads to righteousness?  But thanks be to God that, though you used to be slaves to sin, you have come to obey from your heart the pattern of teaching that has now claimed your allegiance.  You have been set free from sin and have become slaves to righteousness.                           Romans 6:16-18

So, you know you are a slave to Christ…how did you figure this out?  Did you wake up one day, having never opened a Bible or heard a word about God, and decide to surrender your own will over to God?  Probably not.  You heard.  You listened.  You learned.  You grew wise.  We like to talk about the freedom in Christ, but are we willing to talk to our daughters about the servitude and surrender?  If we don’t tell them (again and again and again) they will never hear.  If we don’t educate them they will never learn.  If we do not whisper what the Bible says in their ear on a constant basis then they will never grow wise. 

It is up to us to lead by example.  We must swallow our pride and admit we are slaves.

Hope for the future

I will be at my brother-in-law's wedding this weekend (and busy writing in the car).  So I am leaving you with this scripture snack for our Friday post.  *bonus points if you remember Montell Jorden*

Playing with Fire

You can’t touch fire.  In fact, fire has the nasty habit of destroying anything too close to it.  The heroine of The Hunger Games series is Katniss, “The Girl On Fire”.  One comment I have frequently heard when comparing this series with the Twilight books is the strength of the lead character Katniss compared to the clingy, boy-focused Bella.  Katniss isn’t just stronger physically; her greatest asset seems to be her tough emotional shell.  Just like every other fictional heroine, Katniss’s life prepared her to face the challenges in this story.  So what is it about her life that has isolated Katniss into a young girl with commitment issues?

In the world of this story life is hard.  You have to scrounge for food to keep from starving.  Katniss’s father (who died in a mining accident before the story even begins) was a great hunter and he apparently lived long enough to pass a great deal of this on to Katniss.  Katniss loved her father.  They understood each other and were quite close.  Katniss is not particularly close to her mother (who is never named), and when her father dies the nameless mother slips into a depression so deep that Katniss must become her father and provide for the family.  The only emotional connections left to young Katniss are those between her and her sister, Prim, and to her hunting partner, the handsome Gale.  Katniss must be strong, not only because she has no one looking out for her, but because she is responsible for the lives of her mother and little sister. 

Katniss has a difficult time understanding why the adults in her world silence her complaints and observations about life under the rule of the Capital.  She appears to mistake the adult’s lack of hope (their silence) as blindness.  Her character is presented as being lonely in her discernment of the Capital and its oppression.  She can relax and speak her mind with her friend Gale, but she is also becoming aware of his attraction to her, a thing she is not exactly happy about.  Katniss does not express this sentiment until later in the story, but she seems to not want to fall in love because love leads to marriage…and children.  Katniss does not want to watch her own children go through the reaping or the Hunger Games.  Again, this isn’t explained until much later in the books; however, in the beginning Katniss is clear that she does not want or need a romantic relationship. 

Katniss does have an emotional weak spot; she is a sucker for someone who needs her protection.  The only characters Katniss forms any attachments to are all ones that rely on her to protect them like Prim and Rue.  It isn’t until Peeta actually needs Katniss’s help in the Games (up until then he had been protecting her) that Katniss’s character shows some stirrings of feelings for him.  She fights these feelings and is, of course, clueless as to what they mean to her.  In the last book Katniss overhears Gale’s brilliant observation to Peeta that Katniss will ultimately choose whichever of them needs her protection most.  She might be a hunter and ultimately capable of cold-blooded murder, but she loves to rescue the strays and runts of humanity. 

Katniss is untouchable.  She thinks she doesn’t need help from others so it takes her a while to notice when someone is helping her.  She is also bitter and broken by the end of the books.  She has won a battle she never wanted to fight for people she didn’t know or care about.  Everyone she did care for is either dead, far away, or as broken as her.  The author ends the books with the idea that the world will be better for Katniss’s unwilling sacrifices.

Next Friday: Why is being untouchable so attractive to our daughters?

Fictional Friday 1 (into the Hunger Games)

Gale, Prim, Coin, Effie, Kat, Snow, Boggs, Saliva, Cinna, Beetee, Wiress, Chaff, Rue…Nope, you aren’t at a Hippie Convention.  These are the names of characters in the Hunger Games series. 

The Hunger Games series does not have the same draw with adults that the Twilight and Harry Potter series seem to have.  However, many public schools (at least three districts where I live) have it as required reading for a class, so many middle school and junior high school students have read them.  I’ll start with a brief summary of the series for the moms who haven’t read the books. *Beware, spoilers ahead*

Katniss is the main character throughout the series.  She is tough, emotionally distant, and generally clueless about her own power throughout the story line.  She gets stuck in a love triangle with Gale and Peeta (the first is the home-town hunter and the second competes in the Games with Katniss).  Death hangs over her head in various manners in each of the stories.  She triumphs despite incredible odds against her.

The books are centered around a future society where the government rules by fear.  Two children, one boy and one girl, from each of the 12 districts are chosen at random each year to compete in The Hunger Games (hence the title).  The Hunger Games are basically ancient Roman gladiator games; you can attract sponsors who will give you gifts that will help you, you have to kill your opponents, the “coliseum” is rigged with deadly traps to make things interesting.  Most importantly, this is all done for the amusement of the Capital.  The prize won by the district with the last child alive is an increase in food, thus less of their citizens will die of hunger that year. 

The second book is again a competition in the “coliseum” but with adults (some very old) and our young protagonists.  The third book is the rebel’s fight against the Capital.  Katniss is dragged into the rebel’s fight and made into their propaganda tool.  In the end, the rebels win (using horrible methods) and Katniss is in a position to take out their ruthless leader…which she does. 

I am oversimplifying quite a bit, but I wanted to give you a foundation to stand on so that as we look at this more in depth you have an idea of what is going on.  Some of the topics we will be looking at are:

• Sacrifice
• Humility
• Love (Romance)
• Family relations
• Gender Roles
• Trust (Peers and Adults)
• Isolation (Loneliness and Abandonment)
• Death (Fear of and Fascination with)
• Power
• Destiny/Luck

I can not say that I liked these books much.  My emotional reaction when reading the books was generally cranky and sad.  My kids didn’t like talking to me when I was reading them. J  I do see a few positive elements in the stories.  There were some nicely handled themes of a strong physical community, the manipulation of media, and the need to see the real truth. 

I would love to hear from others on these books!  There are not as many forums and the forums out there are not very busy.  I would love to hear what you enjoyed about each character you liked.  How did you feel about the killing in the books?  What were your favorite scenes in the book?  Why would you recommend these books to someone else?

Arranging a Marriage

I have found the perfect future groom for my daughters.

• He doesn’t swear or get drunk (though he isn’t strictly opposed to drinking).
• He is punctual and doesn’t seem to get lost (probably because he doesn’t mind asking for directions).
• He loves children.
• Given how frequently he is invited to weddings I hold out hope that he is a good dancer.
• He has a witty, though dry, sense of humor.
• He has the mind of a philosopher and a body use to hard labor.
• He would be fiercely protective of her with the power to back up his threats.
• He is affectionate, loving, tender, and attentive.
• He will ardently pursue her until he wins her hand.
• He would have absolutely pure motives in his time with her.  He would never ask her to comprise her morals by lying or being immodest.
• He will love her unconditionally, always encouraging her to hold herself to a high standard.
• He is quick to forgive and happy to forget past transgressions.
•  He always has an attentive ear and will adore her as if she is the only person in the world.
• He is happy to assume leadership within the home.  His style of leadership is to never lord it over anyone but to lead by modeling serving others.
• He is a master orator and storyteller.  He has never lost a case when arguing before the Judge.
• He will always have time just for her.
• His looks are average but he has a smile that could light up the world.
• He has a great relationship with his Father, but was not afraid to leave home and make his own way in the world.
• He has a wonderful healing touch.
• He is a wonderful provider.  His fishing skills alone could feed a village.
• He knows his scripture inside and out, and he is not afraid to live by it.
• He will never leave her.  There is no place she could go that would separate her from his love.
• He is most interested in her inner beauty.
• He is an excellent judge of character.
• His Father owns a huge mansion filled with gold and jewels.  He has a bright future in store; his Father has always said that his son will one day rule the world.
• He can read her mind. J
• He is willing to die for her…in fact, he already has.

Do you know this man?  Have you introduced your daughters to him yet?  No earthly man could live up to the standard we women reach for, but Christ can.  I hope my daughters find loving husbands who do their best to model their lives after Jesus’ example.  I hope too that my daughters understand that a man will fail them occasionally.  God never will.

Twilight Tuesday 9 (The desire for "more than this ordinary life")

The need for a quest or mystery to give us purpose is not a uniquely feminine quality.  Being Christian does not diminish our Humanity.  We long to be a part of something great and important; to have value in this mortal coil.  But a strong relationship with God, a necessary component of living God’s plan for us, is all about surrendering to God.  Being in a stage of rebellion makes it difficult to see the advantages of surrendering to anyone. 

            The purpose in our hearts for something “more than this” life is our subconscious knowledge that this world is lacking something.  We can reject God’s purpose for us as the Pharisees did (Luke 7:30).  We can work against God’s purpose, either out of ignorance or desire for our own will, but His plan will always win out (Acts 5:38).  We quickly question God’s plan when we feel God has denied us something we think we need.  We need to share with our daughters the prayers we are grateful that God didn’t answer the way we wanted Him to.  Mothers have the pressure of being a role model when it comes to living a life with purpose for God.  Not that your daughter can’t see you struggle, but she needs to at least see conviction through your actions that it is a struggle worth having.  I wrestle with this in my own life.  Trust me, writing this article has been a huge wake up call for my parenting skills.   And you never get it right all the time.  I would settle for almost half of the time!

God tells us, unmistakably, the path he wants us to walk (obedience isn’t just for our children), but he doesn’t force us.  We are not puppets on a string.  Puppets are never the heroines in the story because there can be no courage or sacrifice without first having free will.  Our created purpose is to worship Him though.  We are to have no other gods before God (Ex. 20:3). 

We can turn to Romans 12:2 for inspiration that we do not have to be removed from the world, but we do have to find the will to not be conformed to it.  Following God’s plan to give us “more than this” can cost us in worldly terms; friends, money, respect.  I know it was hard for me when I was a teen to grasp the long-term perspective of my heavenly reward for following God’s adventure.  I didn’t have enough years then to see value to benefits I would not receive for many years. 

God’s will for our lives, to reflect His glory, does not sound very glamorous to today’s satisfaction-soaked youth.  But the world knows how to grab our daughters’ hearts.  The world talks about princesses, true-love, and beauty (warped as the standard may be).   As mothers and as Christians, we need to remind our daughters that they are already the child of a King.  They are princesses in a drama that will allow them to be heroes, if they would just be open to the possibility.

Twilight Tuesday 8 (A Grand Destiny)

In the Twilight series, Bella is an ordinary girl, with brown hair and a tendency to bump into things and fall.  Of course, young girls want to be Bella!  You can be desirable in all these ordinary ways and find out that you aren’t so ordinary after all.  Bella was born to be an eternally beautiful, filthy rich, globe trotting vampire with a husband who is just as obsessed with her as she is with him.  We want to be surprised one day that our days of mundane life have paid off in such a way too!  She didn’t have to study for years to get these things.  She didn’t have to work for it or gain life experience for years before it was an option.  All Bella had to do was be a “good” average person; she moves to her dad’s house as a kindness to her mother, though her mother doesn’t know it, and finds the fulfillment for her life. 

            What Edward can offer your daughter is eternal youth and devastating good-looks.  She will become hotter than a super model without having to diet and work out.  Edward has endless time, money, and energy to offer for the adventure.  He is older and more mature despite his youthful appearance.  He is the ultimate sugar daddy without the weird Oedipal/Electra complex. 

            The exciting action of this series isn’t simply how a vegetarian vampire or a reluctant werewolf woos a young human girl with “no natural instinct for self-preservation.”  There are numerous times when lives are at stake (no pun intended).   In the Twilight series, Heroism means to dodge danger with no fear to yourself but a complete focus on others’ lives.  Selfishness is not a quality tolerated well by characters in these books.  But what gives meaning to the characters’ lives is primarily based in their relationships (this is at its heart, a romance series).