Tuesday, July 12, 2011

When does Aunt Flo visit?

Menstrual cycle, there I said it.  Period.  Aunt Flo.  “That time of the month.”  The Curse.  How, when, and where do you discuss this with your darling little girl?  If you wait too long she could hear about it from friends or worse yet, start her menstrual cycle and think something is seriously wrong.  But you don’t want to jump the gun and give her the information so soon that she can’t really understand it or appreciate what you are sharing with her. 

The average age for a young lady to begin her period has been decreasing over time; it seems to be anywhere between 11-14 at this point.  Body mass and heredity can both effect when our daughters get their first period.  Our pediatrician shared with us that when a girl gets breast buds, the clock starts ticking for her first menstrual cycle to appear; within 18 months.  Even before breast buds your daughter might need to start using deodorant when she is active, or not, if you prefer eau de armpit in scaring the boys away.

While it might be awfully tempting to leave this lovely life lesson until the last minute, please think about what this communicates to your daughter. 
  • Menstrual Cycles are shameful (because we don’t talk about them unless we have to and only in whispers when we do.)
  • Your body is broken/gross (because you have “shameful” menstrual cycles.)
  • The time of your menstrual cycle typically called your “period” is not positive or feminine (because we hide it even from other women if we can and only talk about it negatively when we do share about it.)
  • You have no control of this negative process (therefore I had nothing to educate you about concerning it) so just grab a pad/tampon, a Midol, and wait it out.

Obviously, I don’t believe these things to be true or I wouldn’t be writing about it.  So I want to encourage you to check out Maidens by His Design (MbHD).  I loved this curriculum and have even taught it as a group class once.  I wanted to give you a chance to look up this resource before talking more about educating our daughters on this topic next week.  We did use the Passport to Purity curriculum, but we used it after going through MbHD.  Take a look.  Share what you used with your daughters, if you dare [insert evil laugh here], because we need to talk about this together in order to undo the negative influences that we have been bombarded with over the years.  


  1. I can't believe I'm posting this, but don't forget to tell her about the hair she'll get in new places. I remember being so embarrassed about growing armpit hair and trying to hide it. I thought I was the first girl in my class to get it and it took getting my picture taken in my dance costume for me to confess to my mom and get her help. I think my mom did a pretty good job being open about these things but it was still a little traumatic.

  2. Yup, we covered that too in the group class. It worked out very interesting because we had at least 3 different nationalities and apparently there are differences in body hair across racial barriers. It was also great to hear from the other moms how they tackle hair removal; shaving, waxing, Nair, and rubbing with a pumice stone (wish I had it as easy as the last one!).